The promise of a live rendition of Believe in Me led me to the podcast of Weekend Wogan yesterday. Boy did it bring back bad memories.
Leaving aside the moments of mumbling and fading away into nothing on the part of the host (which in itself reminded me of some of the commentary from his latter Eurovisions), it was depressing to hear churned out once again Sir Terry's tired remarks about our beloved Contest.
I don't know when the erroneously styled 'Mr Eurovision' first started saying that the 'rest of Europe' takes Eurovision 'seriously', but here he was again saying the same thing decades later. Really? The rest of Europe takes it seriously while the UK doesn't?
Where to begin? Maybe those oh-so-serious entries from Ireland, Estonia and Spain in 2008. Or the seriousness with which Poland, Italy, Andorra, Monaco and many more have flitted in and out of the Contest over the years. Even this year's hosts aren't taking it 'seriously': witness the appearance of Sarah Dawn Finer's alter-ego Lynda Woodruff at both Melodifestivalen and Eurovision last year and, in an even bigger role, in Malmö itself.
Meanwhile, the UK's non-serious approach has included us entering the competition every single year since 1959 (I think only Germany beats that), clearing the schedules of BBC3 for both semi-finals even though we're only obliged to watch the one we're voting in, and getting creative talents such as Bonnie Tyler and Andrew Lloyd Webber involved.
I don't know if it was ever true that the rest of Europe in general takes the Contest 'seriously'. Even in 1957 the Germans had a song involving singing into a telephone. The truth really is that the UK is no different to any other participating country: the level of enthusiasm fluctuates from year to year. Maybe it's also the case that all other countries also think the 'rest of Europe' both 'takes the Contest seriously' and has some kind of conspiracy against them.
The second old classic that Sir Terry wheeled out was the one about the countries 'east of the Danube' all voting for each other and by extension not for the UK. Because of course that is the choice: either vote for the former USSR and its satellites, or for the UK. Never mind the third option: vote for one of the other countries that have won Eurovision in recent years such as Germany, Sweden, Greece, Finland and Norway. I don't have the stats but the runaway victory of Sweden last year, along with the abject failure of the UK, cannot be put down to Ukraine and Russia voting for each other.
What frustrates me most as a fan is that Sir Terry must know all of this, but prefers even after all these years to trot out the same clichés. Poor old Bonnie didn't seem to know how to react.
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